September 19, 2024
Dementia. Alzheimer's. These words are hard to hear, and even harder to face in yourself or one you love. My father has dementia, and it's only getting worse. It looks like he's not going to be to stay in his assisted living facility, because he's no longer able to care for himself to the degree they require. The basics of life are increasingly difficult for him to accomplish on his own, so my brothers and I are facing the reality that we will need to move him into a long term care facility very soon. He's only 72, which makes it all the harder for us to process. Was it too many hits to the head while playing football at LSU from 1970-1973? Too much Ambien for too long? Stress and poor choices? The brain stem stroke he had back in 2005? Genetics (his mother had Alzheimer's)? We don't know why it's happened, especially since he was taking all manner of supplements the past decade to stave the disease off. All we know is that the man we knew the last 40+ years is barely still the same. It's hard, especially for my brother who lives in town with him in Hot Springs. It's difficult to know that we're walking the long, slow, goodbye of forgetfulness unto death.
I know my brothers and I aren't alone. Many of you are going through similar struggles, whether with an aging parent, a spouse, or a beloved friend. We live in a fallen world, and these afflictions of the mind are some of the miseries that Adam's sin brought to our race. Death is inevitable, and the loss of mental faculties is often a part of how the Lord brings a life to a close. Yet in the midst of a caregiver's sorrow and pain the Lord grants grace to cry out to Him, to lean on Him, to know that He will never leave us nor forsake us - and He will not abandon His son or daughter who is no longer in their right mind. Through the suffering of dementia the Lord gives the not-yet-demented opportunities to glorify Him by honoring a parent, sacrificially loving a spouse till death do you part, or bearing a friend's burden. He reminds us to enjoy our loved ones while they are still in full possession of their mental sharpness. He urges us not to take life and reading and intellectual pursuits for granted. And He calls us to walk by faith and not by sight, to know that "the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us" (Romans 8:18). Maranatha! Come quickly, Lord Jesus!